SelFulfillment Articles - Emotional Intelligence Issues


Are You one of the Volga Boatmen?  
by Susan Dunn


The magnificent painting, "Burlaks on the Volga River", is now in the public domain. Most of us have heard the Russian folk song, "The Volga Boatmen," and welcome a look at what the song is about. The song is often sung like a dirge, and you will see why when you look at this painting by Repin: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Burlaks_on_volga_by_repin.jpg.

Now, to refresh your memory, you can click here http://www.youtube.com/v/WufB-eeSPB4 to hear the song sung, in an old Nelson Eddy movie. The lyrics to the refrain are:

Mighty stream so deep and wide Volga Volga you're our pride Heave ho, heave ho

Now, you can do this exercise I use in my Emotional Intelligence training, and in courses and seminars. In this painting, we see a team at work, doing manual labor. You can probably identify some of the people in the painting. Who is the young golden boy? The one at the rear who seems about to collapse? The leader in the front, old, but apparently doing fine? Which one is you?

Now, on a blog entitled "Volga Boatman," a member of the clergy writes:

"Thinking about liturgical music, the Volga boatmen came to mind. Somewhere in the dim recesses of my mind is an image of men on a towpath, dragging a boat through a canal, accompanied by 'Yo, heave, ho.' And there are times when I feel like one of the guys on the rope line. Dragging the congregation through a Mass, dragging a choir through a new hymn or setting. But those are nothing compared to the way it's going to feel when we try to move forward from what many refer to as 'the four-hymn Mass' to 'ritual music.'

"Anyone who works in the church music world knows that after almost every Mass, someone comes up and tells you that she loves the music because it's strong/tender/enlivening/comforting/'real Catholic music'/up-to-date, etc.

That individual is followed by someone who hates it. It's too loud/soft/fast/slow/traditional/modern/hard-to-sing,etc.

[I used to be the Outreach Director for a church and greeted people as they came in the sanctuary. I would hear, "It's too hot in here/just right in here for once/freezing cold in here." Everyone should have this experience in order to understand what "leadership" is all about.]

However, that's not my point here. I have a few questions for you, actually.

1. Do you find it odd the clergyman didn't see himself as the man on the boat in the orange shirt? 2. Would there be anything 'wrong' if the leader were on the boat, not hauling? 3. What about if he were pitching in? He appears to see himself perhaps as the man in the front right. Dragging them forward. 4. If you were the man in the orange shirt directing this whole thing, would you feel guilty? 5. Did you even see the man on the boat in the orange shirt?

It's about the big picture: --Not letting your emotions get in the way of your perceptions, --About what you 'read into' a painting. We all do this. That's why there are paintings, and why we love them. (The great arts [culture] BTW, are an important component of emotional intelligence). --The experiences you have had, and the emotions around them that you bring to apainting become your reality. --Your beliefs and attitudes about labor, i.e., all work is slave labor and you are condemned to do it ... or think-work is lazy, manual labor is "honest labor" --How much you identify with the people in a painting and why --How much you know about Czarist Russian and if you can distance yourself to get intellectual; or, conversely, if you automatically intellectualize your emotions --Your attitudes toward paintings - worthless nonsense, "not for me," "what's the purpose? - why are you 'making' me look at a painting?"

Some people identify with the Volga boatmen, and immediately start talking about "slave labor." Others identify with the suffering in general (especially if they are familiar with this time period in Russia's history) and they usually fail to see the men on the boat, or to remember them. Some who are leaders see themselves as the man in the orange shirt, while others who are leaders see themselves as the man front left. Others might start fantasizing about never having to work.

There are many reactions you can have.

One suggestion for the New Year, if you see yourself on your current job as one of the Volga boatmen - slave labor, and heave ho, heave ho - it may be time for a new job?

About the Author

Susan Dunn offers coaching, internet courses, business programs, and ebooks for your personal and professional development. She trains and certifies coaches, and is the author of The Difficult People Internet course, interactive. Visit her on the web at www.susandunn.cc, and mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc . Email for fr** ezine.




Markus Wolf Dies in Berlin: The Spy Who Knew Emotional Intelligence  
by Susan Dunn


"Making use of human weaknesses in intelligence work is a logical matter," said Markus Wolf, master spy. "It keeps coming up, and of course you try to look at all the aspects that interest you in a human being."

Markus Johannes "Mischa" Wolf who epitomized East German spying during the Cold war, died November 9 in his home in Berlin, according to news reports.

He was head of the General Reconnaissance Administration, the foreign intelligence division, of East Germany's Ministry for State Security (Stasi). According to Wikipedia, he was the Stasi's number two for 34 years, most of the Cold War. He ran a network of 4,000 spies.

According to the BBC, Wolf was the model for John LeCarre's character "Karla". In his memoirs, Memoirs of a Spymaster (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0712666559/susandunnmome-20 ), he claimed to have "perfected the use of sex in spying." He was described as tall and incredibly handsome. See his photo here: http://www.dhm.de/lemo/objekte/pict/BiographieWolfMarkus_photoWolfMarkus/index.jpg .

This knowledge and use of human nature, emotions and urges - one's own and others - is what EQ is all about, and why we need to develop and learn it. We have here the sword and the shield of Emotional Intelligence demonstrated quite well. It is as useful to know Emotional Intelligence to use for good purposes in influencing others, as it is to be able to defend oneself from having it used against you. It informs us when to use logic and cognitive intelligence, and also allows us to be able to do so.

In my EQ Course this week we're taking a look at Othello, a compelling example where one person's knowledge of human nature and human weakness was used to bring another person down. Othello refused to give the promotion to Iago, and the enraged Iago knew exactly how to do Othello in. He did so in a cold, logical calculating way, without ever laying a hand on him. He had studied Othello and knew exactly what buttons to push. Othello, who was unable to control his emotions and therefore unable to think rationally, was manipulated by Iago to his ultimate demise. In the end, Othello kills the woman he loves, and then kills himself. If you want to hear the ultimate in human agony - a person who undoes himself - listen to Mario del Monaco sing Verdi's magnificent and agonizing "Niun Me Tema," (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSqyj90agw0) , Otello's lament as he says farewell to Desdemona, whom he has killed, and then kills himself.

There isn't much about "human nature" Shakespeare didn't know. Here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwK9v35bi40 ) you can see Giuseppe Giacomini and Sherrill Milnes sing "Si Pel Ciel," where Iago plants the lie in the mind of Otello that his wife is unfaithful Does this sort of vengeance and self-sabotage take place in the corporate world today, in the Board room, in the halls of congress? It's the origin of many of the sayings we have - you can't shoot a man born to hang, and don't interfere with a man who's busy doing himself in.

Use Emotional Intelligence proactively, or to protect yourself. If you don't know yourself and your vulnerabilities, if you can't control your emotions enough to think straight and control your actions, someone out there will do it for you, and you won't like the results.

On the positive side, if you wish to keep your own behavior clean and maintain your integrity, understanding how people can be manipulated through emotions is as useful for those who wish to avoid this as it is for those who wish to practice it.

To quote Thomas Cleary in his introduction to Sun Tzu's Art of War, "This idea of knowing while being unknown, repeated again and again [is] the key to success."

The cornerstone of emotional intelligence is self-awareness, through which you can be aware of others. This means of their emotions, for it is emotions that move us, not logic and reason. Othello should have known Desdemona would never have been unfaithful, if he had stopped and thought. But Iago short-circuited his "thinking brain" and he fell prey to his own emotions. If you don't have the awareness, and the self-management Emotional Intelligence brings, there will be a Mischa, or an Iago out there, ready to use it against you.

Emotional Intelligence is power. Use it wisely!

About the Author

Susan Dunn, www.susandunn.cc, mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc. Susan trains and certifies coaches worldwide in a fast, affordable, comprehensive, no-residency program. She offers relationship and emotional intelligence coaching, business programs, Internet courses and ebooks. Email for free EQ ezine.





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